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Archive for the ‘Age’ Category

This may seem a little sacrilegious to some folks, but bare with me for a little bit.

I grew up in a Pentecostal Preacher’s home.  I loved every minute of it.  Really!  When I was young and we would have a revival (extended series of services), we went to church every night of the week.  Then we progressed to having Saturday Nights with no service.  That was great because then we didn’t have to go to church on Saturday Night with curlers in our hair.  No hot rollers back in those days so we had to roll our hair Saturday Night so it would be pretty for Sunday.  Not quite sure why it wasn’t so important to be pretty on Saturday Night. 🙂  Anyway…then we progressed to having Monday and Tuesday Nights off and having Revival services Wednesday through Sunday.  Ahhh..the joys.  Well,  in some of those long services when my friends and I would get a little bored we would make up things with the songs we sang in church.  Here are a couple we use to sing and  then laugh ’til we cried.  My brother and sister was in on it too.  “Now lettuce (let us)  have a little chocolate (talk with) Jesus, Lettuce tell Him all about our bubbles (troubles)….”  and,  “I’ll fry (fly) an egg (away) Oh glory…” .  As I got older we still had fun with songs.  We would mix words up like, “Oh glory je to bejus let the rallelujahs hole….”(Oh Glory be to Jesus, let the Hallelujahs roll).

Other times people thought they heard something different then what was actually being sung.  A friend of ours, Bill Henry, who we (Nathan and I) sang with for many years, wrote hundreds of awesome songs.  One song he wrote, “Running With HEAVEN on My Mind”,  had to have a little word change, because the first time we sang it he had written it to say, “I’m running with WINNIN’ on my mind” and a man in our church was laughing after service because he said it sounded like we were singing,” I’m running with WOMEN on my mind.”  🙂    My mother-in-law said that when she was a little girl she couldn’t ever understand why they would sing a song in church about a cross-eyed bear name Gladly…”Gladly the cross I’d bare…”.  Singing is good for the soul but it can kind of get you trouble sometimes too.  For instance, one time when my Dad resigned from a church, he then asked Mother to sing and she sang, “It Will Take Me a Million Years to Thank the Lord”.  Probably not the best selection for the moment. 🙂

Well, I hope you have enjoyed my little tour down memory lane.  I’m sure if you were raised in a preacher’s home you could tell some of your own stories.  Just thought I’d share a little church humor with you.  Hope you don’t think I’m horrible, but P.K.s  are good at finding ways to have good fun, even in church. 🙂

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HOW TO CALL THE POLICE WHEN YOU ARE OLD AND DON’T MOVE FAST ANYMORE . . . George Phillips, an elderly man from Meridan, MS was going up to bed when his wife told him that he’d left the light on in the garden shed, which she could see from the bedroom window. George opened the back door to go turn off the light, but saw that there were people in the shed stealing things. He phoned the police, who asked “Is someone in your house?” He said, “No, but some people are breaking into my garden shed and stealing from me.”Then the dispatcher said, “All patrols are busy. You should lock your doors and an officer will be along when one is available.” George said, “Okay.” He hung up the phone and counted to 30. Then he phoned the police again. “Hello, I just called you a few seconds ago because there were people stealing things from my shed. Well, you don’t have to worry about them now, because I just shot them,” and he hung up. Within five minutes, six police cars, a SWAT team, helicopter, two fire trucks, a paramedic and ambulance showed up at the Phillips’ residence, and caught the burglars red-handed. One of the policemen said to George, “I thought you said that you’d shot them. George said, “I thought you said there was nobody available!”

True story . . . . I LOVE IT.

Don’t mess with old people.

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